Keeping up with the "Other Girls"- When Self Improvement has you feeling inadequate


This post is going to be a bit different than my usual blog posts. Yes, I am still a DIY and interior design nerd. I dream about light fixtures and paint colors and thrifting is my scared "ME" time. Most people do not know that I am always looking for ways to improve my self-balance, my time management and my overall "happy." I want to live my best life and I understand that I do not have all of the answers and I cannot do it alone. I love listening to amazing podcasts on my drive to work in the morning ( I drive an hour and 20 minutes each way). I follow some great blogs and day dream over perfectly branded Instagram pages where the content is carefully curated and beautifully photographed. Every night, I soak in the bathtub for what seems like forever in complete silence- and self reflect on my day, my goals, my family and my challenges. This time is zoned out for me to unwind and I look forward to it every evening.

Lately however, I have been feeling so inadequate with my self care rituals, my time management and my overall "happy." I have so much to be thankful for right now, I am so incredibly blessed and yet I still feel like my life is lacking the very balance that I strive for. I listen to the podcasts, I read the books and the blogs and I feel like I follow the advice and implement the messages in my daily life- yet I do not feel any more "together" than before. Its not that I think living a balanced life is an achievable "to-do," with a 5 step program- I just thought that like anything else in life, by putting in effort and practice, change would start to happen.

After thinking it over on the way home from work today, I have decided that maybe the willingness to actually put in the effort towards self improvement is the actual change I am hoping for. I may never be someone who has it "all together." My Instagram pictures may never be perfectly styled and I am not someone who can add #veganflow on my captions on social media. Sometimes, I eat like crap and I don't always know how to apply makeup perfectly (or consistently for that matter).

I realized that keeping up with "all the other girls," is not a good idea at all. My mistakes, my struggles and triumphs are what make me, me. My willingness to improve myself can possibly be inspirational to someone out there. My vulnerability and willingness to share my struggles, may truly help someone else. That doesn't mean I have to abandon my self improvement channels or daily reads- they take my mind off the hectic of the day and provide me a sense of calm, focus and positivity for the day, that in itself is a major plus. Everyday, I can establish 3-5 "small win" goals that I can accomplish. Everyday, I can wake up and push myself to accomplish at least one thing that fulfills ME.

My advice on this ladies ( or gents) is to view self improvement efforts as a journey, not action items. Love and appreciate your struggles and quirks and grant yourself grace when you happen to fall short. Lastly, do not compare your chapter 1 to someone else chapter 20- your life book is your own, its unique and reflective of YOUR journey and your strengths. Does this mean you should throw your self-help books out the window? hell no! I am only encouraging you to refocus your focus in reading them. You may not be able to follow the tips and tricks literally YET- but you can fund ways to implement the messages in your RIGHT NOW.

Wishing you all of the best!

XOXO Nikki

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